We tend to think that sexual identity is either black or white. We like to assume that our sexual orientation and identity is either heterosexual (attracted to the opposite sex) or homosexual (attracted to the same sex). Where in fact there is a middle spectrum of sexuality, a grey zone, in between the two. That middle spectrum is called Bisexuality (Bisexuals exist)
What is Bisexuality then?
1. 'Bisexuality is being attracted equally to both men and women' (The Messy Realities of Bisexuals)
2. 'Bisexuality is the tendency to be sexually attracted to both men and women.' (3 Myths about Bisexuality Debunked by Science).
Many of us though, are biphobics, We assume that bisexuality is just a phase of experimentation or people lying about their homosexuality. When in fact there is a lot of research supporting that bisexuality exists. For instance the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention's National Survey of Family Growth, carried out a research on the sexuality of Americans, where the results showed that 16% of women and 5% of men supported that they were equally attracted to both genders. (The Continuing Controversy over Bisexuality)
Dr. Samantha Joel in her article in Psychology today '3 Myths About Bisexuality Debunked by Science' supports that bisexual people actually have a hard time fitting in either to the straight or the gay groups, since they cannot deeply relate to them and they feel misunderstood.
Moving on, she also debunks some stereotypical beliefs about Bisexuality, supporting that:
- Bisexuality exists. The study 'The male bisexuality debate revisited: Some bisexual men have bisexual arousal patterns' published in Archives of Sexual Behaviour showed that bisexual men were aroused by both men and female clips, confirming the fact that they were not 'faking it'.
- Bisexuality is not a phase. The study 'Female bisexuality from adolescence to adulthood: Results from a 10-year longitudinal study' published in Developmental Psychology showed that over the 10 year course the study was carried out, only 8% of the participants changed their sexuality from bisexuality to homosexuality, proving that bisexuality is not a phase.
- Bisexual people can be faithful. This was proved through the study 'Female bisexuality from adolescence to adulthood: Results from a 10-year longitudinal study' published in Developmental Psychology that showed that over the 10 year course, 89% of the bisexual participants were in long term relationships.
There is still a lot of research to be carried out on bisexuality and its characteristics, however there are some things that we all need to remember.
According to Dr. Gary W. Wood's book 'Sex, Lies and Stereotypes' , we all need to understand that none of us is actually 100% female or 100% male. We all have male and female trades within us. We need to realize that we are all somewhere in the gray zone. Our biological sex differs from our social sex. Our sexual identity and orientation could be more of a stereotype than a reality.
Loren A. Olson M.D. closes his article in Psychology Today 'The Messy Realities of Bisexuality' so beautifully that it is worth quoting it here. He writes:
'I don't really care much if bisexuality is defined as attraction or reaching into someone's pants if it helps to avoid feelings of shame and disconnection. All of us are worthy of being loved, and when labels are used to divide and reject, they are destructive. We seek to enjoy the feeling of love and belonging, and our wish to connect with others is the reason we're here.'
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